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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24843514">Never Forget You</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account'>orphan_account</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>ASTRO (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Coma, M/M, Major Character Injury, Memory Loss</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 06:09:03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>13,529</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24843514</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“Eunwoo was in an accident.” Bin shot up immediately, five little words suddenly making everything feel numb.</p><p> “He’s stable for now but he injured his head badly in the crash and the doctors - they think there’s a good chance he might not wake up.”</p><p>Bin felt as if the world had crumbled beneath his feet. A crashing, all-consuming pain devoured him and all he wanted to do was scream. But Bin couldn’t move. Couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t utter a word.</p><p>This is what life is without him, he thinks briefly before his legs gave out and his vision went black.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lee Dongmin | Cha Eunwoo/Moon Bin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>55</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hello! I've written fics before but never anything like this so I'm kind of nervous but I hope you enjoy it!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Moon Bin gazed at Dongmin’s sleeping form. It was rare for Bin to be up before the other boy and he wanted to savour it. Dongmin was always beautiful, but for Bin, nothing compared to the peaceful expression he donned while asleep.</p><p>He recalled when they first met as trainees all those years ago. Bin didn’t like him at first, thinking he had only gotten his far because of his looks. Dongmin was so much more than that though. He was hardworking and kind and funny and within six months of meeting him, Bin knew he was screwed. It only got worse after they debuted and they were spending virtually all their time together. Not to mention having to share a room with the boy he secretly loved <em>sucked.</em> Eventually, he couldn’t keep it to himself anymore and blurted out a confession one night.</p><p>Dongmin had dragged him to bed after one too many drinks. As he tucked Bin into bed, they locked eyes and Bin just said it.</p><p>“I love you.” His inebriated brain remembered it as a sweet, heart-felt confession, however, Dongmin later told him that he barely understood what Bin had said due to his drunken slurs. He blacked out after that. He woke up the next morning ashamed and embarrassed, assuming he had just ruined everything. The last thing he expected was Dongmin to offer him breakfast and tell him he loved Bin too.</p><p>Bin smiled at the memory and pulled him closer into his chest, planting a soft kiss on his forehead. Dongmin stirred but didn’t open his eyes. It was a door closing loudly that finally roused him. He groaned and he rubbed his eyes as he sat up.</p><p>“Morning,” Bin said fondly, pushing himself up on his elbows to kiss his cheek.</p><p>“Morning.” He replied mid-yawn.  “You’re up early.”</p><p>Bin chuckled. “It’s ten-thirty; not that early.”</p><p>Dongmin whined quietly, “you should have woken me up,” before swinging his legs over the edge of the bed to get up. “I told my parent I’d visit them today.”</p><p>Bin wanted to pull Dongmin back down. He wasn’t ready to get up and restart their act, in which they pretended they were nothing more than bandmates and friends. Bin knew it was necessary and he never admitted it to Dongmin, but he hated hiding their relationship. They had been together for just over two years. Bin hated keeping it a secret from the very start, however, back then they shared a room and could be together freely behind closed doors. Then they moved dorms and Dongmin had to go and win the room by himself while Bin ended up with Jinwoo. It wasn’t that he didn’t love their leader; he did as much as any of the other members but the new arrangement made it much more difficult for him and Dongmin to spend time together. Bin was almost glad when Jinwoo walked in on them making out on the couch.</p><p>Thankfully, their ever-loving leader was wholly accepting of them. Perhaps not of them making use of the couch but he had agreed to keep it a secret as well as help them out when they wanted to be together. That was two months ago. Since then, with Jinwoo’s help, things had gotten easier for the couple. This way they still got to sleep together at night.</p><p>“Binnie,” <em>God, I love that nickname,</em> “you getting up?” Dongmin asked, pulling a shirt over his head.</p><p>“Yeah, just admiring the view,” Bin smirked back up at him.</p><p>Then Dongmin hit him in the face with his pants and he shut up.</p><p>
  <strong>_______</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>It was their day off. A day typically reserved for visiting family, Minhyuk and Sanha had instead opted for a movie marathon the night before and they were already well immersed in the first film. Myungjun had left early on to see his parents and Jinwoo was taking full advantage of their free day by sleeping in. This left the dorm remarkably quiet and allowed for kisses to be easily exchanged between the couple while they made breakfast. Dongmin wrapped his arms tightly around Bin’s waist and rested his chin on his shoulder as Bin flipped pancakes.</p><p>Bin giggled at his boyfriend's clinginess, “are you just going to stand there watching me?”</p><p>Dongmin mumbled indistinctly in reply making Bin smile.</p><p>They remained in the kitchen to eat their breakfast, neither wanting to leave their little bubble. They sat across from each other in comfortable silence, simply enjoying each other’s company. Opportunities to be alone like this were too few and far between.</p><p>“Alright, I have to go now,” Dongmin said, putting his plate in the sink and pulling on a coat.</p><p>Bin pouted. “Do you have to?”</p><p>“You could come with me.”</p><p>“No thanks, your mum still kind of freaks me out.”</p><p>Dongmins laughed, “for the last time, my mother is not a scary woman.”</p><p>“She’s nice but I feel like she can look into my soul and know all my secrets.” Bin shivered at the thought.</p><p>Dongmins suddenly leans over close to Bin’s face, a condescending grin on his face. “You have secrets?”</p><p>Bin pressed his lips together, looking away suspiciously. “No,” he said quietly making the other man guffaw. Dongmin kisses him and with a quick “goodbye”, headed for the door. As he reaches for the door handle, a strong hand grabs his wrist, pulling him around into a warm embrace.</p><p>“Binne!” He complained feebly, pressing a small smile into his boyfriend’s shoulder.</p><p>“Just a little longer,” Bin whispered, running a hand through his hair.</p><p>Dongmin pulled away after a long hug. “I’ll see you later.”</p><p>Then he left and Bin joined Minyuk and Sanha, never thinking for a second Dongmin’s words might not be true.</p><p>
  <strong>_______</strong>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Jinwoo got out of bed shortly after Dongmin left and Myungjun returned a few hours later.</p><p>“Where’s Eunwoo?” Myungjun asked as he took a seat with the others.</p><p>“Went to see his parents,” Bin replied, throwing a piece of popcorn in his mouth. “He should be back soon.”</p><p>“Great ‘cause I bought alcohol!” A chorus of delightful yells followed as Sanha jumped up to see what Myungjun got. Their elation was cut off as manager Noh entered. They greeted him cheerily and offered him a drink. He shook his head solemnly and told them they should sit down. “This is going to be hard to hear.”</p><p>Bin rested on the arm of the couch next to Minhyuk. He could feel his heart start to race at their manager’s expression as a voice cried in his head <em>something’s wrong.</em></p><p>Manager Noh swallowed nervously a few times before starting to speak. “Eunwoo was in an accident.” Bin shot up immediately, five little words suddenly making everything feel numb. He couldn’t see the other members but he could hear their shocked exclamations behind him.</p><p>“Is he okay? What happened?” Jinwoo asked, voice audibly shaking.</p><p>“He was driving,” Noh continues, answering the latter question. “Someone ran a red light and crashed into him. It was… bad. They took him straight to the hospital, he made it out of surgery a few minutes ago.” They looked at him expectantly, all desperate to hear their cherished member was okay. “He’s stable for now but he injured his head badly in the crash and-“ he cut off suddenly and whipped a hand over his head, letting a deep sigh out. “The doctors – they think – they think there’s a good chance he might not wake up.”</p><p>Bin felt as if the world had crumbled beneath his feet. A crashing, all-consuming pain devoured him and all he wanted to do was scream. But he couldn’t move. The others looked around at each other in disbelief before breaking down one by one. But Bin couldn’t move. His eyes remained trained on manager Noh as his eyes welled up watching the other boys' reactions. But Bin couldn’t move. Couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t utter a word.</p><p><em>This is what life is without him, </em>he thinks briefly before his legs gave out and his vision went black.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I know virtually nothing about medicine or intensive care so I apologise in advance if I got stuff wrong. Also, only a tiny bit of Eunwoo in this one (conscious Eunwoo that is) but it's an important chapter anyway. Enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Hey,” Jinwoo whispered in greeting to Myungjun. He crouched down next to the older man outside of Dongmin’s hospital room. It had been two weeks since the accident and Dongmin’s condition hadn’t improved. His heart had stopped three times and he’d had two additional surgeries since then. He still hadn’t opened his eyes.</p><p>As far as the media and Aroha were concerned, Dongmin was simply recovering from an accident and would be back working with the group soon. The fallout from news like this would be astronomical. As much as they tried to be positive and reassure each other, they all knew Dongmin wouldn’t be joining them any time soon – if ever. Well, everyone but Bin knew that. Bin had refused to lose hope from the very beginning. He sat by Dongmin’s side mumbling under his breath “wake up” all day until the nurse would come and tell him he had to leave.</p><p>The other five had been taking turns keeping him company, not that he ever acknowledged they were there. Jinwoo had arrived at the hospital a few minutes earlier to relieve Myungjun. The older man looked exhausted, not that Jinwoo was surprised. Dealing with Bin these days had become a real challenge.</p><p>“You should go home,” Jinwoo said, resting a hand on Myungjun’s back. “Sanha ordered chicken, you could probably make it back in time to get some.”</p><p>“Thanks but I think I want to stay.” It was unusual for Myungjun to be so quiet and unhappy. It made Jinwoo want to wrap him in a hug. “I don’t want to leave you alone with him. He’s kind of an ass.” A small smile finally crept onto his face but Jinwoo knew it was phoney, only made to try and lighten the mood.</p><p>“I’ll be alright,” Jinwoo said, knocking their shoulders together. They sat together in silence for a few minutes before Myungjun sighed heavily and pushed himself up. “Good luck,” he said genuinely, turning and walking away. Jinwoo felt like he would need it.</p><p>When he entered the private room he was met with the monotonous beep of the heart monitor and whoosh of the ventilator. Jinwoo always found it unsettling in there. Seeing his friend practically on his death bed, hooked up to a breathing tube and covered in wires was bad enough but it was Bin sitting heartbroken at his lover's side that made him sick. The man had barely eaten in three days, even then only at the insistence of the other members. His eyes were sunken and unfocussed; his clothes hung loosely on his body. Jinwoo half expected him to pass out at any second. And yet Bin never wavered.  He’d sit by Dongmin’s side as long as he was able, grasping his hand tightly as if he could will him to open his eyes.</p><p>Bin regarded Jinwoo briefly when he entered but didn’t linger long. The door clicked shut behind him and took a seat beside Bin.</p><p>“How are you?” He asked frivolously. As expected, he received no reply. He sat back in the chair, pulling his legs up comfortably and watched the lines move on the heart monitor.</p><p>About an hour later, Jinwoo was struggling to stay awake when Bin finally spoke. It was the first thing Jinwoo had heard him say in three days. His words, however, made Jinwoo wish he had stayed silent.</p><p>“It’s my fault.” Jinwoo’s mouth opens like a reflex to immediately disagree with him. Bin continues before he can. “I stopped him. As he was leaving I stopped him. I wanted a hug – god,” He shook his head at himself, thinking how stupid and selfish he had been. “If I had just let him leave when he wanted to, he would have gotten to the traffic lights later and…” he rested his head on Dongmin’s hand, voice becoming muffled by the hospital sheets. “He would have missed that other car.”</p><p>Jinwoo didn’t know what to do. He felt helpless; a powerless bystander to a horrific disaster. Bin’s body started to shake violently as he’s wracked with sobs. “If I had held on just a second longer-“ suddenly, he let out a bellowing, uncontrolled wail that shook Jinwoo to his core.</p><p>“It’s not your fault.” He said firmly, grasping Bin’s shoulders in an effort to stop his shaking. “It is <em>not </em>your fault. It was an accident; you had no way of knowing what would happen. “ Bin’s whimpers didn’t falter. “<em>It is not your fault.</em>” He emphasised again.</p><p>“I miss him.”</p><p>Jinwoo could do nothing but reassure; make empty promises. “He’ll wake up”, “he’ll be fine”. Bin needed to believe it even if no one else did.</p><p>It felt like hours before Bin’s tears finally ceased. The monotonous sounds of the hospital room were joined by Bin’s soft hiccups every so often. It was growing dark outside and Jinwoo could feel his phone vibrating in his pocket as the others tried to reach him.</p><p>“Do you think he’d be mad at me?” Bin mumbled.</p><p>“It’s not your fa-“</p><p>“Not that,” He interrupts, finally raising his head and looking at Jinwoo. “For moping.”</p><p>The exact phrase the other members had been using was ‘angsty and depressing’ but he wasn’t going to tell Bin that. “You-you’re not-“</p><p>“Cut the crap, I know what you guys have been saying about me.”</p><p>Jinwoo pressed his lips together guiltily. “Sorry.”</p><p>Bin smiled, small and dismissive and Jinwoo realised it’s the first time he’s smiled since the accident. “It’s alright. You’re right. I’m being stupid aren’t I?”</p><p>Jinwoo contemplated lying but figured tough love might be the way to go at that point. “Yes. You’re being absolutely ridiculous. If he could see you now, he’d hit you so hard-“</p><p>He cut off, surprised by Bin’s unexpected laugh. “Yeah, he would wouldn’t he.” He looked back down at Dongmin, smile dropping off his face. “I’m not ready yet though. I’m not ready to stop moping yet.”</p><p>“That’s alright,” Jinwoo replied immediately. “Take all the time you need. We’ll all be right here when you’re ready.”</p><p>Bin throws him a slight smile, not saying anything. He didn’t have to for Jinwoo to know he was grateful.</p><p>“I wonder if they left us any chicken,” Bin said after a few minutes.</p><p>“As if!” Jinwoo laughed heartily. “It was probably all gone before even Myungjun got back.”</p><p>Bin pushed himself up slowly, chuckling softly and pulled on his coat. “Maybe we should stop for something on the way back then.”</p><p>Jinwoo nodded in agreement then quickly leaves the room so Bin can say his goodbyes.</p><p>“When you decide to wake up,” he started, leaning in close to Dongmin’s ear, “I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t actually hit me. Even if I am being stupid.” Then he pressed a kiss to his cheek and headed home.</p><p>
  <strong>_______</strong>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Things got easier after that.</p><p>Bin started eating normally, conversing with everyone, being himself again. Things weren’t back to normal yet by a long shot. They’d still buy food for six people. They’d look for Dongmin when making jokes. Bin would still cry at night. But it was getting easier.</p><p>Before they knew it, months had passed.</p><p>Dongmin was now able to breathe on his own and had been moved out of intensive care. The cuts and bruises on his face had healed and the ventilator had been removed. He looked as if he was sleeping now. It made it difficult for the members to visit him. They struggled to see him so peaceful with the knowledge he might not wake up. The doctors would say it was a good thing; that it was a sign he was healing but it didn’t make the five boys feel much better.</p><p>It was particularly hard on Bin, who could only now bring himself to visit once a week.</p><p>Yet, they soldiered on. Their group activities had of course been suspended and a lot of their solo schedules had been cancelled as well so they spent a lot of time doing nothing. Jinwoo had been keeping himself amused writing songs with Myngjun’s help and Minhyuk was always off dancing somewhere, unable to keep still for too long. Sanha spent most of his time keeping Bin company and the two had gotten really into watching dramas.</p><p>They couldn’t go on like that forever, though.</p><p>“It’s time you need to decide what you want to do.” Manager Noh said, sitting them down one afternoon. “It’s been eight months since Eunwoo’s accident and the media are getting pushy. They want to know what’s going on.” They looked around at each other nervously. They should have known this would come up eventually. Photos from Dongmin’s accident had gone viral and people were anxious for answers on his real condition. “The company heads have given you as much time as they could but we’re out of time now. You need to make a decision.”</p><p>“About what?” Sanha asked, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.</p><p>“About our careers, Sanha,” Jinwoo said softly before their manager could.</p><p>Manager Noh nodded solemnly while the five boys looked down, dejected. “You have two options,” He continued. “One: you disband.” Their displeasure was immediate and blaring. He cut them off before they could voice their outrage. “You’d continue as soloists: acting, singing whatever you like.”</p><p>“But we wouldn’t be Astro anymore,” Myungjun whispered to himself.</p><p>“But you wouldn’t be Astro anymore,” Noh confirmed sadly.</p><p>They’re quiet for several seconds, coming to terms with the new information.</p><p>“What’s our other option?” Bin asked, breaking the silence. He hadn’t looked up from his wrung hands in his lap since Dongmin’s accident was mentioned.</p><p>“Your other option is to continue as a five-member group. You’d still be Astro-“</p><p>“But we wouldn’t be!” Bin yelled, suddenly frustrated. “How can we be Astro when Mi –“ His voice cracked at Dongmin’s name and he quickly changed his wording. “When he isn’t here with us?”</p><p>“I’m not asking you to make a decision right now.” Manager Noh already seemed exhausted by the conversation. “You just need to start thinking about it-“</p><p>“Why is this even our decision?” Minhyuk finally spoke up, cutting of Noh again. “Shouldn’t there be someone in an office somewhere deciding this all for us?”</p><p>“Well, yes and obviously they’d prefer it is you stayed together but considering the circumstances, it was only fair for the choice to be left up to you.”</p><p>It was silent then as they contemplated the consequences of the choice they now had to make. Manager Noh excused himself shortly after, leaving them alone. Needless to say, they didn’t like either of the options presented to them and Minhyuk said as much.</p><p>“So obviously those options suck,” he frowned deeply.</p><p>“Well duh but we still have to choose one.” Myungjun sighed loudly.</p><p>Bin zoned out as they started talking. He thought of Dongmin. He thought of being on stage without him. Of late-night practices that didn’t end with him falling asleep on Dongmin’s shoulder. He felt sick. They had dealt with schedules without Dongmin in the past but not knowing if or when he’d be back was something Bin never imagined he’d have to consider.</p><p>“Bin?” A voice echoed in the back of his mind, bringing him out of his reverie. “Bin!”</p><p>“Sorry, what?.” He shook his head free of the distressing thoughts.</p><p>“What do you want to do?” They looked at him expectantly and Bin suddenly felt very guilty for not listening to what they had to say.</p><p>He looked down at his lap, mind blank. He didn’t know what he wanted. All he knew for sure was he needed Dongmin.</p><p>That wasn’t possible though. So he’d have to find the answer himself.</p><p>“I don’t know.” Minhyuk rubbed his eyes, seemingly drained while the others shifted uncomfortably in their seats. Bin continued, “I don’t want to quit now. We trained for years, we left our families, friends, our normal lives for this. I don’t want it to end yet.” He looked up his bandmates, looking them in the eyes one by one. “But I’ll be okay if you guys don’t want to carry on. In the end, we’ve just got to choose what’s best for us right?”</p><p>“It always freaks me out when he says wise crap like that,” Myunjun said, shaking his head at Bin, making them laugh loudly.</p><p>“So,” Jinwoo started, standing up. “We’ll take a vote then. All in favour of carrying on?”</p><p>The decision was unanimous: they were still Astro.</p><p>
  <strong>_______</strong>
</p><p>Bin visited Dongmin the next day.</p><p>He told his comatose boyfriend all about the previous day's events. After they had informed their manager of the choice, they bought pizza and alcohol and toasted to the safe return of Dongmin.</p><p>“Then Jinwoo and Minhyuk got <em>really </em>drunk and started ranting about how they were going to write all the songs and choreograph all the dances for the next album.” He chuckled softly. “Although, based on how bad their hangovers were this morning, they probably don’t remember much of last night.”</p><p>His phone buzzed in his pocket, alerting him to the fact they had no more milk (though Bin didn’t know where it had all gone considering the morning before they had two cartons in the fridge – one of the many mysteries of living with four other men).</p><p>“I should go,” he said, picking up his coat to leave.</p><p>As he bent down to kiss Dongmin’s cheek like he always did, a foreign noise sounded from Dongmin’s throat. He shot up straight at the sound. It was a deep and rough groan. And it came from Dongmin – injured, <em>unconscious</em> Dongmin.</p><p>“Min?” He whispered, unsure, and hesitant. “Min, are you-are you awake?” Nothing happened. Bin stood there for a few minutes, squeezing Dongmin’s hand, begging him to open his eyes. Nothing happened. Just as he was about to dismiss what he had heard and go home, the sound echoed through the room again.</p><p>This time it was accompanied by a slight twitch of Dongmin’s eye. Bin’s heart began to race as he cupped Dongmin’s face in his shaking hands. “Min,” he begged desperately again, eyes starting to fill.</p><p>That’s when it happened. Bin had waited for it for months, had dreamed of what it would be like to finally look in his eyes again.</p><p>“Min,” he mouthed silently as Dongmin’s eyelids fluttered and opened slowly. He didn’t look at Bin at first, instead taking in the unfamiliar surroundings. His lips opened slightly as his gaze moved from one beeping machine to the next.</p><p>Then his eyes fell on Bin.</p><p>His features softened in surprise as their eyes locked.</p><p>“Hi,” Bin whispered, feeling a tear slip down his cheek. He couldn’t explain the relief and joy he experienced as he <em>finally </em>saw his lover again. It was an unrivalled, unadulterated feeling. “Hi,” he repeats, unable to think of any other words.</p><p>“Hi.” Dongmin’s voice was hoarse after being unused for so long. Despite the rough sound, it’s the most beautiful thing Bin’s ever heard.</p><p>Bin must have done something evil in a past life to deserve what came out of Dongmin’s mouth next. “I’m sorry, who are you?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I'm not entirely happy with this chapter but it's the middle of the night over here and I've only just got my laptop up and running again so I wanted to post this anyway. I hope you enjoyed it regardless! ^^<br/>Next chapter Eunwoo officially back and we'll start to get more Binwoo. Whoop!<br/>I can't guarantee the next chapter will be up any time soon but I'll do my best to try and get it out by next weekend at most.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is SO much later than what I had planned but I've had exams these past few weeks and preparation ended up being more stressful than I expected so I haven't had any time to write.<br/>School's over now, though, which means I get to spend my summer writing. Whoop!<br/>Enjoy this very long chapter!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The man leaning over Dongmin was beautiful, to say the least. Even with tears staining his cheeks, Dongmin found himself wanting to stare at him all day. There was something familiar about his smile. Something that made him feel warm and cherished. But it was very unnerving at the same time. Dongmin had never seen this man in his life and couldn’t begin to comprehend the look on his face.</p><p>Dongmin’s eyebrows furrowed, perplexed. “I’m sorry, who are you?”</p><p>The man’s smile dropped immediately and Dongmin suddenly wished he hadn’t said anything, wanting to preserve that precious smile.</p><p>“What?” He said, voice shaking. “Min, it’s me.” He had used that nickname earlier. This man clearly knew who he was. By his expression, it seemed he knew Dongmin very well but he still couldn’t place him. He could feel on the tip of his tongue; there but just out of reach.</p><p>“I-I’m sorry I don’t-“ the doctor walked in before he could finish and the man gets pushed to the side of the room, out of Dongmin’s gaze as the doctor starts his examination. He zoned out after that, only vaguely being able to answer the doctor’s questions. He searched his peripherals, desperate to see the strange (familiar) man again.</p><p>He eventually gave up, more curious to know why he was in a hospital. The last thing he remembered, he was driving to his parents. Driving to his parents from where? That feeling returned. He should know. Why didn’t he? He could feel it was somehow connected to the man but couldn’t figure out how. Why couldn’t he?</p><p>“-do you understand?” The doctor's voice drew him back to reality. “Mr Lee, do you understand?”</p><p>“I’m sorry, what?” He rubbed his eyes.</p><p>“You were in a car accident, do you remember?”</p><p>And suddenly he did.</p><p>Not the impact itself but he remembered waking up in the car. The emergency services were struggling to get to him. His head had throbbed painfully as he felt warm blood trickling down his face. He remembers thinking of someone, remembers begging anyone who would listen to allow him to see that person again. Then his eyes had closed, pain dulling as he slipped into unconsciousness.</p><p>The doctor continued to tell him what happened. About his surgeries and the coma. Dongmin knew he should have been grateful to just be alive but something about the whole situation didn’t add up. There were too many unanswered questions.</p><p>Before he could voice any of them, however, the man appeared in Dongmin’s line of sight again. He whispered something in the doctor's ear before retreating backwards. The doctor looked surprised at whatever the man had said but quickly masked it, turning back to Dongmin</p><p>He gestured to the man and asked: “Do you know this man?”</p><p>Dongmin looked again, searching his desperate face for any clues as to how they knew each other. He came up empty. “I’m sorry, I don’t.”</p><p>“Are you sure?” He questioned, looking concerned as the man lowered his head, jaw tightening. Dongmin nodded slowly, unsure, and unable to look away from the seemingly devastated man. He mumbled something under his breath and quickly stumbled out of the room, not sparing another glance at Dongmin.</p><p>The doctor continued his questioning, asking about different aspects of his life. “Do you know how old you are?”, “what are your parents’ names?”, “do you know what you do for a living?”. He could answer lots of them easily, but it was alarming how many of them he didn’t know. Simple things like his occupation, where he lived, or how he spent his last birthday.</p><p>After a few minutes of questions, Dongmin was already exhausted. With a big yawn, the doctor was finally prompted to leave, and Dongmin was alone. He wanted to sleep – ironic considering he had been sleeping for eight months – but there were too many questions rattling around his head. He stared at the heart rate monitor beside his bed, strangely comforted by the rhythmic beeping of the machine. He couldn’t stop thinking about that man. About his bright smile, his kind, tear-filled eyes. What was their connection?</p><p>Eventually, his fatigue won out and he drifted off. He couldn’t have been asleep more than half an hour when a hand on his shoulder woke him. As soon as his eyes fluttered open, he was wrapped in a warm, familiar embrace. His mother. When she pulled away and cradled his face with her hands, he was surprised to see she had been crying. He had never seen his mother like this before and it was startling, to say the least, but made him realise he was truly loved and missed.</p><p>His mother doted on him in a way he wasn’t used to while his father simply sat by his side smiling happily. It wasn’t until the doctor returned a few minutes later and explained his memory situation quietly to his parents that their joy fell away.</p><p>He only heard bits of the conversation. “He didn’t recognise him?” his mother said, shocked. “Are you sure?” his father asked, sounding deeply concerned. He couldn’t follow what they were talking about but it was obvious whatever he had forgotten in the accident was something big.</p><p>“It would probably be easier coming from you.” The doctor said softly to his parents before leaving once again. His parents exchanged a troubled look and Dognmin was beginning to get frustrated. Everyone seemed to know what was going on but him.</p><p>“Just tell me.” He said. “Please?”</p><p>His mother pulled out her phone, quickly getting a photograph up as she sat down.</p><p>She held the phone out to him, “do you recognise these people?”</p><p>The photo was of six young men, all very handsome, all beaming up at the camera, arms wrapped tightly around one another. Dongmin’s eyes scanned each of their faces one by one. Nothing about any of them was familiar. However, his mouth dropped open as he noticed the two men in the back, one of which he quickly identified as the man from earlier. It wasn’t his appearance, though, that startled Dongmin. If fact it was the <em>very </em>familiar face next to him that was alarming. Dongmin’s face.</p><p>“Th-that's me – I don’t understand-“ He looked up at his parents helplessly, desperate for answers. “Who are these people? Why am I in a photo with them? I-I don’t-“ he was starting to panic and could feel his heart start to race as his head throbbed painfully.</p><p>His mother rested her hand on his shoulder, trying to calm him to no avail. He grabbed his head, pulling on his hair and dragged his legs up close to his chest as his breathing accelerated.</p><p>Through it all, he could hear his mother’s voice in the background. “I know this is a lot to take in but, Dongmin, you’re an idol. You’re a member of the group Astro. The boys in this photo – they’re your bandmates.”</p><p>But Dongmin didn’t remember any of it.</p><p>
  <strong>_______</strong>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <strong>December 8<sup>th</sup> 13:44</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>You have one new message.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>New messages:</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Hi, Bin-hyung! It’s Sanha. Uh, Dongmin-hyung woke up! Although I guess you already know that, huh?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>We just wanted to make sure you were okay since you haven’t been home in a few days…”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Ask him where he is.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I was about to, M-hyung, shush.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Don’t tell me to-“</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Anyway, we were just wondering where you are. We’re all at the hospital now. Dongmin-hyung doesn’t want to see us though… if you want to join us – hold on M-hyung’s making mean gestures at me – stop it! Stop it! Ah Bin-hyu-“</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Message deleted.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>December 23<sup>rd</sup> 16:58</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>You have 4 new messages.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>New messages:</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Yah, Bin! It’s Myungjun again. Why haven’t you been answering?! We know you’re at your parents. Your sister called us so you might as well pick up your phone now.</em>
</p><p><em>Bin? Binnie?! </em>Moon Bin! <em>Come Home!</em></p><p>
  <em>Come home, come home, come home, come home, come home!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I’m not going to stop until you come back!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Come home, come home, come home, come home, come home, come home, come home, come home, come home, come home, come home, come home, come home, com-“</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Message deleted.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>January 1<sup>st</sup> 7:23</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>You have 12 new messages.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>New messages:</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“…Hi… It’s Minhyuk… happy new year, I guess…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Everyone else has already left you a ton of messages asking you to come back and clearly it’s not working so… </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dongmin-hyung’s doing alright. He still doesn’t want to see us. His mum says he isn’t ready yet. His physical therapy’s going well, though, and he should be getting discharged soon…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I know that probably doesn’t help but I figured you should know. He’s okay.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I’ll go now. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>I hope you’re doing alright and you really should come back home soon. It’s weird around here without you.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Okay, bye.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Message has been saved.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>January 12<sup>th</sup> 23:17</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>You have one new message.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>New messages:</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Bin? Jinwoo again.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Just wanted to let you know Dongmin’s getting discharged next week. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Not sure if that makes you want to come back or – no you know what? I’m not doing this anymore. We’ve all tried to give you space but it’s been over a month now and this is just getting ridiculous.</em>
</p><p><em>We both know you’re going to come back eventually because you love him. Even if he doesn’t remember you, you will always love him and you </em>are <em>going to come back for him.</em></p><p>
  <em>When he gets out of here – when he has to adjust to a life he doesn’t remember – he’s going to need you there to help him. So just get your ass back here and save us all the trouble, okay?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…I’ll see you later.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Calling Park Jinwoo.</em>
</p><p>
  <strong>_______</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>Dongmin was set to be discharged in a few days. In anticipation of finally being out of the hospital, he had taken to strolling the halls aimlessly. Most days he’d just wander up and down the stairs in an attempt to strengthen his weakened muscled. On this particular day, he took a different route, wanting to avoid the chatty learning lady on the stairs (he had been caught in her trap before and she had tried to set him up with her daughter. He had avoided her like the plague ever since).</p><p>He followed the hospital halls round and round, greeting nurses and other patients politely as he did until he fell into a trance. His memory loss seemed to be isolated to the other Astro members and everything related to them. It certainly explained why he could remember things like how old he was but not what he did for his last birthday since he had spent it with the other boys.</p><p>He hadn’t seen the man from his hospital room – Moon Bin as Dongmin now knew him – since that day. Dongmin thought about him often, still determined to figure out his traumatised expression when he realised Dongmin didn’t remember him. His parents had told him everything they could about what he didn’t remember, including his relationship with the other members. As close as his parents explained they were, however, Moon Bin’s guise somehow didn’t explain their so-called ‘friendship’.</p><p>Other than that he had seen clips from the drama’s he had been in and videos of Astro concerts. None of it felt real though. It was as if it was happening to a stranger Dongmin couldn’t even begin to relate to. This man, Cha Eunwoo, was confident, charming, talented. Everything Lee Dongmin wasn’t. All they shared was a face.</p><p>As he came out of his reverie, he realised he had somehow strayed into the waiting room.</p><p>He had been warned about wandering around the hospital – there was no telling how far crazy fans would be willing to go. There were dozens of people milling around, awaiting news of their loved ones given their solemn expressions. Some sat patiently, distracting themselves with their phones while others paced anxiously. No one looked up as he rounded the corner into view.</p><p>As he ducked his head and turned away, praying silently no one noticed him, a familiar voice stopped him in his tracks. It was a soft, innocent sound even though the person seemed frustrated.</p><p>“Hyung,” the boy whined loudly. “I really have to go, please just give me my phone back.”</p><p>“No! I don’t want to stay here all by myself.” Now <em>that </em>voice Dongmin definitely recognised. Kim Myungjun’s voice. Unique and memorable even after just a couple of video clips. Dongmin swirled around, searching through the crowd for the faces that matched those voices.</p><p>They were fairly easy to locate considering they were now sprawled out over three chairs fighting over a phone (way to maintain their image). Sanha clambered around Myungjun, desperately trying to get at the phone the shorter man was currently lying on top of.</p><p>“MJ-hyung!” Sanha complained, temporarily ceasing his attacks. “I promised Jinwoo-hyung I’d meet him at the practice room ten minutes ago!”</p><p>“Ten more isn’t going to kill him! Just stay until Minhyuk gets here, please. This place creeps me out.” Myungjun pulled a face, glancing around cautiously as if a ghost would pop out and scare him at any second.</p><p>All the while Dongmin stood frozen, staring at the two men. He had long since paused his fear at being recognised, instead falling into an internal quandary. The first week after he woke up, his parents told him they visited every day. And every day he would refuse to see them. They were strangers, as far as he was concerned, and he had no interest in meeting them. Eventually, his parents had stopped saying they were waiting to see him. Dongmin had just assumed they had given up, catching on to the fact Dongmin didn’t want to know them.</p><p>Yet here they were.</p><p>After five weeks they were still here waiting to see him.</p><p><em>They must have been busy</em>, he thought, noting the bags under their eyes and the sluggish way they moved. Despite how tired they were, they were still here. For him.</p><p>Dongmin stumbled backwards, taken aback. His mother had told him again and again that the six of them were ‘like brothers’; that they would do anything for each other but it was different seeing them here in person. Giving up their time to be here, waiting, even though Dongmin never wanted to see them.</p><p>He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to put a damper on the sudden desire he had to go over and talk to them. His head spun viciously as Myungjun’s high pitched squeal echoed around the small waiting room.</p><p>When he opened his eyes after a few minutes, Sanha was gone and Myungjun was pouting down at his phone, clearly having lost their immature fight. Once again, Dongmin found himself desperately wanting to talk to the older man. This time, however, he didn’t try to repress the feeling and slowly stepped forward towards Myungjun.</p><p>“E-excuse me?” He said quietly, shifting nervously on his feet as he stood before Myungjun.</p><p>Myungjun hummed in reply, doing a double-take when he finally looked up. He shot up, almost hitting Dongmin as he did. He looked around frantically as if not believing Dongmin was actually there. Suddenly, he grabbed Dongmin’s shoulders harshly, face torn between shock and excitement.</p><p>“Oh my god, you’re really here!” He practically screamed, bouncing up and down.</p><p>Dongmin was starting to regret this. People were looking over, whispering amongst themselves and Dongmin’s anxiety at being recognised was beginning to return.</p><p>“Can we go somewhere more private?” He mumbled, trying to get Myungjun to calm down.</p><p>Dognmin quickly led him away from the crowds, heading back to his room. They walked in uncomfortable silence as Myungjun virtually vibrated with anticipation.</p><p>“So,” Myungjun started, unable to hold back. “Did you want to talk about something?”</p><p>“Yes, kind of,” He replied. They continued to his room quietly and took a seat across from each other, both avoiding eye contact.</p><p>“Is there anything you want to know?” Myungjun asked hesitantly.</p><p>“Nothing specific… my parents told me everything I don’t remember. It’s just… some of it doesn’t make sense. It feels completely different person.”</p><p>Myungjun nodded, sympathetic and understanding. “I guess there’s a lot your parents can’t tell you.”</p><p>“Like what?”</p><p>“Well like… alright, the night of our debut let’s say. When we got back to the dorm we were all pretty exhausted and overwhelmed and you started crying. Then Jinwoo started crying which set me off and the six of us ended up sleeping on the floor in front of the tv with our debut stage playing over and over again in the background.”</p><p>“Really?” Dongmin asked chuckling softly. </p><p>“Oh yeah, we were a mess but it was a good night. Minhyuk made popcorn, we ordered pizza, then in the middle of the night Sanha rolled over on top of me and I almost died.” Myungjun cringed at the memory. “<em>That </em>wasn’t fun but the rest of the night was nice.”</p><p>“I wish I could remember that.” And for the first time, he meant it. Of all the stories he’d been told since he woke up, this was the first one that actually felt like <em>him. </em>At that moment he wanted nothing more than to share the memories of the five other boys who cared so much for him.</p><p>“Will you ever remember?” Myungjun asked faintly.</p><p>“I don’t know. The doctors say my memories could come back on their own with time or they could never come back at all.”</p><p>“Is there nothing you could do to help get them back? Jinwoo read something the other day that said being in the place the original memory was created could trigger the memory to return.”</p><p>“Yeah, the doctors told me that too.” He had ignored them though. If that was true, his best bet at getting his memories back was to go home with the other members. A few weeks ago that was the last thing he wanted to do. However, now, after speaking with Myungjun for just a few minutes, he already felt comfortable with the other man. As if they had known each other for years. <em>We have, </em>he thought. All of a sudden he found himself genuinely wishing he could remember their friendship and regretted waiting so long to meet him.</p><p>“I want my memories back.” Myungjun’s head shot up, mouth dropping open in surprise “I want to know what kind of a person I was before all of this. I want to remember all the times we fell asleep on the floor together after a tough day. <em>I want to remember.</em> If going home with you is the way to do it, then that’s what I want to do.”</p><p>Myungjun didn’t reply. His mouth hung open as he blinked rapidly in disbelief. In all fairness, Dongmin was as shocked as he was at his words. “You want to <em>what? Really?</em>”</p><p>Dongmin nodded and Myungjun fell back in his seat, not knowing what he was supposed to do now. “Okay,” he said, shook but still managing to put a smile on his face. “I’ll call the others and let them know, we’ll get your room cleared up and… you can come home I guess.”</p><p>
  <em>Home. That sounds good.</em>
</p><p>
  <strong>_______</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>Three days later, he was discharged. His parents were accepting and understanding of his decision to not return home with them.</p><p>Over the past few days, he had met up with all the members separately and could already understand what his parents meant when they called them ‘brothers’. The only person he hadn’t seen yet was Moon Bin. It was still unnerving how drawn to him Dongmin felt after only one meeting but he could never bring himself to ask the others about him. Either way, he was looking forward to going back with them.</p><p>They all picked him from the hospital – minus Bin – and the ride to the dorm was loud and boisterous, making Dongmin smile the whole way.</p><p>He sat next to Sanha and the two spoke familiarly as Sanha scrolled through photos on his phone telling Dongmin all the crazy stories behind them. One of the photos was just of Dongmin, Sanha and Bin. It was taken many years ago given Sanha’s childlike appearance in which the three of them wore silly animal hats.</p><p>Once again Dongmin’s eyes were drawn to Bin.</p><p><em>Where is he? </em>He wondered silently.</p><p>“Where’s who?” Sanha asked. Apparently, he had not wondered silently.</p><p><em>Oh well, no going back now. </em>“Moon Bin? He’s not here and he hasn’t been at the hospital, I was just wondering if he was alright.”</p><p>Sanha looked away suspiciously while the others shifted in their seats, glancing at each other sheepishly.</p><p>“Bin-hyung…” Sanha started slowly. “He – um – he-“</p><p>“He went to visit his family.” Jinwoo interrupted, not looking back at the two. Myungjun beside him looked to him in shock. “He’ll be back soon.”</p><p>Dongmin didn’t need to know them very well to know that was a lie. He didn’t know what reason they’d have to lie but the mood had already shifted and he didn’t want to push it any further. Instead, he smiled, said a simple “okay” and asked Sanha to see more pictures.</p><p>The atmosphere in the car became almost suffocating after that and by the time they got to the dorm, Dongmin was exhausted. They showed him around the dorm and took to his room, making sure he was settled.</p><p>“Bin and I are next door-“ Jinwoo told him.</p><p>“And I’m down the hall with these two idiots,” Myungjun interrupted, gesturing to Sanha and Minhyuk. The two youngest members gaped at him, offended.</p><p>“Shouldn’t I be the one saying that?” Minhyuk said causing an uproar between Myungjun and Sanha.</p><p>Jinwoo sighs loudly, shaking his head. “The point is,” he shouted over them. “If you need anything, just yell.”</p><p>“Thank you.”</p><p>“Um, Minhyuk was going to make some food and we were going to watch a film if you want to join us?” Jinwoo offered.</p><p>“Thanks, but I’m kind of tired…” he trailed off and they nodded in understanding, quickly making themselves scarce and leaving Dongmin to his own devices. Now that he was alone, however, he was beginning to regret his decision to come back with them. Just a few hours with them made him want to crawl into bed. They were wonderful people. Dongmin could tell they genuinely cared about him and were doing everything they could to make him feel at ease. Communicating with them was difficult, though, when he couldn’t remember anything about them. He felt the need to put on an act. To pretend that not having his memories wasn’t the most terrifying thing ever. And it was exhausting.</p><p>He lay in bed, staring at the wall, listening to the distant hum of the others talking. Before he knew it, hours had passed and Minhyuk and Sanha were heading to bed. It was only then his stomach rumbled loudly and Dongmin realised he hadn’t had anything for dinner.</p><p>The dorm was silent. Dongmin assumed they were all asleep and took the opportunity to creep out of his room. He tip-toed down towards the kitchen but stopped and ducked behind a corner when he heard faint voices coming from the living room.</p><p>“-would you tell him that?” He could make out Myungjun whispering frantically. “Bin’s not coming back!”</p><p>“Yes, he is,” Jinwoo whispered back confidently.</p><p>“He called you last week to say he wasn’t coming back, didn't he? What makes you think he’s going to change his mind?”</p><p>“He <em>will </em>come back. I left him another message the other day saying Dongmin was coming home with us. He’ll come back.” Dongmin flinched at the mention of his name. He knew there was a deeper meaning to Bin’s absence. He should have known it had something to do with him.</p><p>“Oh come on!” Myungjun had given up whispering now. “Dongmin’s accident practically destroyed Bin. His memory loss was the last straw. There is <em>no way </em>he’s coming back anytime soon.”</p><p>Jinwoo sighed heavily, frustrated. “<em>He’ll come back,” </em>he insists. “You just don’t understand-“ he cut off suddenly, as if he was about to spill a secret.</p><p>“Don’t understand what?” Myungjun asked suspiciously.</p><p>“Nothing. I’m going to bed.” He deflected, starting to walk away. Dongmin pressed himself into the wall, praying neither of them saw him.</p><p>Myungjun chased after Jinwoo angrily, the two of them bypassing Donmgin quickly. “Don’t you walk away from me, Park Jinwoo!”</p><p>Dongmin stayed in his position against the wall until their voices faded. He didn’t even try to figure out what the two oldest members were whispering about. He had bigger things to think about right now. Namely: food. Dongmin decided to push it to the back of his mind until later.</p><p>He made a sandwich and took a seat on the couch, switching on the television and making sure it was too quiet to disturb anyone. He flicked through channels for a while until he landed on the YouTube channel.</p><p>It occurred to him as he stared at the TV, he hadn’t listened to a single Astro song since he woke up. Perhaps this was the push his brain needed to start remembering things. And so he started his search.</p><p>It was astounding how much they had changed as a group over the years. More than that, how much they had grown as individuals. Once again, Dongmin couldn’t believe the man in those videos was him. He never imagined his body could move like that; never imagined his voice could sound like that. It wasn’t difficult to get sucked into the music videos.</p><p>As astounded as he was by Cha Eunwoo, he still couldn’t take his eyes off Moonbin (‘Blue Flame’ may have killed him a little bit).</p><p>He was smiling lightly at the ‘You &amp; Me’ self-filmed music video when a soft gasp sounded from beside him.</p><p>He spun to face the noise, making eye-contact with a familiar man. The man wore a loose grey hoodie and large glasses, framing his wide, shocked, eyes.</p><p>“Hi,” Dongmin said to Bin.</p><p>“Hi,” he breathed.</p><p>Bin looked as if he hadn’t slept in weeks with bags under his eyes and his shoulders slumped with fatigue. Dongmin’s first instinct was to hug him but he restrained himself.</p><p>“I should go…” Bin mumbled, desperately looking anywhere but at Dongmin as he turned to leave.</p><p>Dongmin suddenly panicked, jumping up and grabbing Bin’s arm. “Wait!”</p><p>Bin’s eyes widened, astounded, and glanced frantically from Dongmin’s face to his hand wrapped around his wrist.</p><p>Dongmin quickly pulled his hand away, embarrassed he had let his emotions take over. He shrunk back, face going bright red as he looked down at his feet. It had been over a month since Dongmin had awoken to Bin’s face and he hadn’t stopped thinking about the man since. He hadn’t expected Bin to show up in the middle of the night, but now that he was here, Dongmin wasn’t ready to let him go yet. He wanted to talk to Bin about everything and nothing; simply wanted to be near him.</p><p>Bin broke the silence, somehow sensing Dongmin’s secret desire. “What’re you watching?” He asked, voice quiet and low.</p><p>Dongmin was taken aback by his casual question but pushed it aside, just grateful he was staying. “Um, Astro music videos…” he glanced back at the TV which was now playing a live performance. “Do you want to watch with me?”</p><p>Bin finally met his eyes in surprise.</p><p>“You don’t have to,” he desperately attempted to take it back. “You’re probably tired, you should-“</p><p>“Yes.” Bin interrupts.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“I’d love to watch with you.” He smiled softly, making Dongmin’s heart race. “I actually haven’t seen some of these in years.”</p><p>Bin plopped down on the couch, inviting Dongmin to sit next to him. He sat gingerly beside him, close enough that their legs were touching and Dongmin’s heart hammered loudly in response.</p><p>Dongmin had already finished many of the videos before Bin arrived but they watched them again together with Bin sharing behind the scenes stories happily. Before he knew it, he and Bin had migrated closer to each other. Bin’s arm rested on the back of the couch by Dongmin’s head while he had curled up into Bin's side. It was about two in the morning and Dongmin was about ready to pass out but wasn’t ready to leave Bin yet.</p><p>“Wow you’re really good,” Dongmin noted as he watched Bin’s solo dance in ‘Knock’.</p><p>“You are too,” he replies immediately, making Dongmin flinch.</p><p>He was too tired to try and stop his next words, “that’s not me,” he chuckled softly, eyes beginning to fill. “I don’t know anything about that person. What he’s thinking. How he’s feeling. What he’s been through. I don’t know any of it. He’s as much a stranger to me as you are.”</p><p>Dongmin instantly regretted his words as Bin recoiled from him and looked down, eyebrows furrowing in pain.</p><p>“I’m sorry, I-I didn’t mean it.”</p><p>“No, it’s okay, I understand. You don’t remember us, I guess we <em>are </em>strangers,” he gritted out.</p><p>“No, Bin, it’s not like that!” He started, resting a hand on Bin’s shoulder in an attempt to make him look at him again. “Everyone has been so nice to me and I really do feel comfortable around you all but it’s absolutely terrifying at the same time.” He sighed heavily, dropping his hand. His voice lowers helplessly, talking more to himself now than Bin. “It scares me that I’m living with five people I don’t remember. It scares me that you guys probably know more about me than I do. It scares me that I can’t rely on my own mind. I’m just… scared and I don’t know what to do.”</p><p>Bin sat beside him in silence as Dongmin began to sob quietly. Everything he had been holding back since arriving was suddenly escaping and there was nothing he could do to stop it. His tears only came on stronger when he felt Bin’s hand gently start to rub his back.</p><p>Dongmin didn’t know how long he cried for. All the while Bin sat, unwavering, by his side offering a comforting word now and then.</p><p>Eventually, his sobs ceased as he fell asleep with, head resting on Bin’s shoulder. Bin held Dongmin close for a few minutes, grateful to be by his side like this again. When Dongmin began to snore softly, Bin shifted to take him upstairs to bed.</p><p>However, as he reached an arm around Dongmin’s back to pick him up, he stirred.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” he mumbled, face buried in Bin’s chest.</p><p>“I already said it’s okay-“</p><p>“Not because of that,” he whined. “For losing my memories.”</p><p>“What?” <em>No,</em> he thought. <em>It’s my fault, it’s all my fault.</em> “Min that’s not-“</p><p>“Myungjun-hyung said you ran away because I lost my memories. I’m sorry for hurting you.”</p><p>“Min…”</p><p>Dongmin didn’t say anything else after that, having fallen into a deep sleep once again. Bin leant back on the couch, defeated, and finally let his tears fall as he held Dongmin as close as he was able. Then he closed his eyes, breathed in Dongmin’s comforting scent and dreamt of a perfect, unattainable life with the man he loved.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This was a really long chapter for me and I don't think future chapters will get this long again as it was really difficult to write. The next chapter will probably be a lot shorter but won't take as long, I hope that's okay. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, it was a long time coming. The next few chapters will be a lot more exciting as well so please continue reading ^^<br/></p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hello again!<br/>Sorry for the lateness of this chapter. Unfortunately, I’ve been very unwell the past few weeks and, as a result, I haven’t been able to write at all.<br/>I’m feeling much better now, though, and am happy to be back writing again so please enjoy ^^</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dongmin awoke to the sound of frantic whispers above him. He squeezed his eyes shut tighter. It had only been a few hours since he had fallen asleep with tear-filled eyes and he wasn’t ready to wake up yet. Instead, he buried his head further into his pillow. His hard – definitely-not-a-pillow – pillow. He shot up, almost hitting Myungjun who had been leaning over him.</p><p>Along with Myungjun, Sanha, Minhyuk and Jinwoo were also there, staring at him curiously. Minhyuk was the only one who was properly dressed whereas the other three looked as though they had just rolled out of bed with their dishevelled hair and unkempt pyjamas. Dongmin briefly wondered where Bin was. Until he realised what he had been lying on.</p><p>Bin was still peacefully slumbering, sprawled out on the couch beneath Dongmin. His face was tranquil and soft as he slept, blissfully unaware of the two youngest members snickering above him. He quickly scrambled off Bin, face turning red as it occurred to him he had spent the night lying on top of the younger man.</p><p>“Morning, sunshine,” Myungjun smiled at him smugly. “Breakfast?”</p><p>They abandoned Bin – who apparently slept like the dead – on the couch in favour of food.</p><p>“So when did Bin-hyung get home?” Sanha asked him as they got settled around the table.</p><p>“About midnight.” He was grateful no one asked why he was awake at that time or about the series of events that led to their precarious positions that morning.</p><p>Jinwoo looked at Myungjun eyebrows raised as if to say ‘told you so’, to which Myungjun rolled his eyes and took another bite of his breakfast.</p><p>“I’m glad he’s back,” Sanha continued, not noticing the elder’s silent conversation. “It’s been so weird around here without him.”</p><p>Minhyuk nodded in agreement before his face hardened. “Although, I’m still kind of pissed at him for ghosting us for a month.” <em>Ghosting them? </em>Dongmin questioned silently as the others hummed affirmatively. His eyes went to Jinwoo who remained quiet, head dropping suspiciously. Clearly, Bin’s absence ran deeper than he was letting on.</p><p>“Well…” Sanha started, a cheeky smile growing on his face. “He’s asleep… on the couch… completely defenceless…” Myungjun and Minhyuk leaned in curiously with equally sinister grins. “We could get back at him for the past month…”</p><p>They grew silent for a few seconds, looking at each other contemplatively. Myungjun bit his lip, looking excited. Just as Dongmin was about to ask what was going on, the three boys shot up and ran off, Myungjun repressing a loud squeal as he went.</p><p>Dongmin’s mouth opened slightly in shock as he turned to Jinwoo for answers. The older man simply smiled and shook his head, as if this kind of thing happened every day. As the three boys come running back into the living room, falling to their knees in front of Bin with pens in their hands, Dongmin was happy to think this kind of chaos would be his life from now on.</p><p>
  <strong>_______</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>Needless to say, Bin was not happy when he woke up.</p><p>Myungjun, Minhyuk and Sanha had drawn Bin a stunning (purple) beard and moustache while he slept. That already pissed Bin off. His mood was only made worse, however, when he found out Dongmin had contributed with some magnificently bushy (purple) eyebrows.</p><p>Therefore, Bin was not happy.</p><p>Everyone else, though, was very happy. Myungjun was currently rolling around on the floor, stomach aching from laughter, while the others – Dongmin included – tried (and failed) to suppress their smiles.</p><p>As they went their separate ways after eating – chuckling to themselves as they went – Dongmin knew he didn’t have to put up an act anymore. After crying in Bin’s arms for hours with no judgment, he knew he didn’t have any reason to be afraid. Didn’t have any reason to not let these people know how he was truly feeling. If the events of that morning proved anything it was that they were a family (a messy, chaotic family, sure, but a family nonetheless) and Dongmin wanted nothing more than to be a part of it again.</p><p>Dongmin went to bed after that, desperately needing more than four hours sleep while Myungjun, Minhyuk and Sanha left for the practice room.</p><p>That left Bin and Jinwoo alone in the kitchen and Jinwoo had questions.</p><p>Jinwoo grabbed Bin’s shoulder, spinning him around as he tried to walk away. In hindsight, maybe he should have let Bin go and wash his face before questioning him because his purple facial hair made it very difficult to talk to him seriously.</p><p>“I thought you weren’t coming back,” he said as Bin’s head lowered guiltily.</p><p>Bin mumbled something inaudible.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“I said you were right!” He practically yells. “I love him and I was never going to leave, okay! For eight months I sat by his side begging that he’d just wake up. And he did. He’s alive. He’s okay. So I don’t care if he doesn’t remember me. I can settle for just being his friend because the alternative is I never see him again.” He exhaled shakily, hands coming up to rub his eyes. “Memories or not, he’s my Min and I’m going to do my damnedest to make sure he’s happy.”</p><p>“Even if that means you’re miserable?” Jinwoo asked hesitantly.</p><p>Bin nodded once with conviction and replied slowly, “as long as he’s happy.”</p><p>“You’re not going to tell him then.” It’s not a question.</p><p>“He apologised.” He said and Jinwoo cocked his head questioningly. “Last night, he apologised for losing his memories. For hurting me. If he found out about us – about how much his accident actually hurt me – he’d-“ He broke off and took a deep breath. “I won’t hurt him like that.”</p><p>“What if he finds out himself? He could remember-”</p><p>“I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it. For now, though, telling him would on hurt him and I won’t do that.” Then without another word, he walked away, leaving a perturbed Jinwoo in his wake.</p><p>As far as Jinwoo was concerned, Bin’s decision would only backfire on him and cause everyone more pain in the future. There was no chance Bin would listen, though, so Jinwoo simply sighed and turned towards the living room, wanting nothing more than to pass out on the couch.</p><p>However, the world seemed to be against him that day and as he turned he came face-to-face with a vexed and curious Myungjun.</p><p>“What the-“ Jinwoo jumped back, clutching his chest at the shock of his sudden appearance. “What are you doing here? I thought you went out with Minhyuk and Sanha.”</p><p>“I lied. I stayed to eavesdrop.”</p><p>“How much did you hear then…?” Jinwoo asked cautiously, avoiding eye contact.</p><p>Myungjun crossed his arms and pouted, frustrated. “Unfortunately, not enough. The walls are surprising thick in this place.”</p><p>Jinwoo exhaled, relieved.</p><p>“What secret is Bin keeping from Dongmin?” Jinwoo averts his gaze as Myungjun leans in close to him as if he could smell the truth if he got close enough.</p><p>Jinwoo stayed silent, lips pressing together, determined to keep their secret. Myungjun was the last person he wanted finding out. Once he knew, Sanha would know within the hour and the two of them together were completely incapable of keeping a secret.</p><p>Eventually, Myungjun gave up trying to sniff the truth and switches to a more Myungjun-esque method of extracting information. Thankfully, Jinwoo was well accustomed to dealing with Myungjun.</p><p>“Tell me.” Myungjun started, arms folded.</p><p>“No.”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“No.”</p><p>“Please.”</p><p>“No.”</p><p>“Why?”</p><p>“Because.”</p><p>“Please!!” He whined loudly, collapsing on Jinwoo, still trying to annoy the secret out of him.</p><p>Ordinarily, Jinwoo would have buckled at this point, being completely weak for a clingy Myungjun. This time, however, it wasn’t his secret to tell and he would take it to the grave if he had to.</p><p>
  <strong>_______</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>Myungjun did not find out the secret.</p><p>Jinwoo was impervious. Even when Myungjun sat on his back for three hours, Jinwoo kept silent.</p><p>That didn’t stop him asking what was going on every second for the next two weeks.</p><p>Thankfully, they had started preparation for their new album which halted Myungjun’s desperate efforts for most of the day (they had already announced they would be coming back without Dongmin and as much as the other members disliked working without Dongmin, it was what they had to do). Most of the time Dongmin accompanied them to whatever they had planned – the recording studio for example – in the hopes it would help him retrieve some of his lost memories (nothing had returned thus far). Because of all the time they had been spending together, he had gotten infinitely closer to the other members, particularly Moon Bin much to Dongmin’s pleasure.</p><p>On this particular day, however, Dongmin had opted to stay home as they weren’t scheduled to get back until late that night. That’s how he ended up curled up on the couch munching on boxed chocolates.</p><p>He was halfway through a Netflix series when he ran out of snacks.</p><p>A glance at his watch told him the others wouldn’t be back for another two hours. He pouted, <em>I really want some more food…</em></p><p>There was a small shop around the corner and he had plenty of money. In the back of his mind, he knew leaving the dorm so late at night just to get snacks wasn’t the best idea but he was lonely and hungry and before he knew it he was throwing on a coat. He made sure to put a mask and cap on as well, in case anyone recognised him, although the streets were thankfully very quiet given the late time.</p><p>The other members had bought him a new phone as a welcome home present as his had been demolished in the accident. Thanks to his new phone, he was easily able to find his way to the shop.</p><p>He got what he wanted – including some snacks for the others – and paid, keeping his head lowered to avoid attention.</p><p>As he exited the shop and pulled out his phone to guide him home, a group of rambunctious teenagers suddenly came running past him, knocking his shoulder and causing his phone to fall and smash on the floor.</p><p>Dongmin cursed under his breath as the teenagers scuttled away. His phone was cracked down the middle and wouldn’t turn on. He sighed, frustrated and pocketed the damaged device. This wasn’t the end of the world; he’d only just made the journey to the shop, he could get himself home, right?</p><p>Wrong. He was lost within five minutes.</p><p>He had wandered onto an unfamiliar road and was beginning to worry but his panic was quickly subdued when he noticed a payphone.</p><p>He only had a couple of hundred won left after his shopping spree but thankfully, being the cautious person he was, he had memorised everyone’s phone numbers. He climbed into the box, depositing the shopping bag on the floor and put his money in, beginning to dial.</p><p>Jinwoo was his first try. Dongmin figured out of everyone, he could trust their responsible leader to answer his phone. Only, when the other line picked up, it most definitely wasn’t Jinwoo.</p><p>“Hello?” A woman answered.</p><p>Dongmin’s first thought is that she is a member of the staff, just holding on to Jinwoo’s phone, but when he asked, she had no connection.</p><p>He fed the machine some more money. <em>I must have just put the wrong number in,</em> he thought, raising the phone to his ear again.</p><p>The same woman picked up.</p><p>Dongmun’s heart was beginning to race. He only had a few coins left now and couldn’t afford to waste them on dialling the wrong number. He attempted to dismiss his fear; he may have miss-remembered Jinwoo’s number but there were still four other people he could reach out to.</p><p>Taking a deep, calming breath, he put yet another coin in the machine and tried to call Bin.</p><p>He got that number wrong too.</p><p>So he tried Sanha. Then Myungjun. Then Bin again. Not once did the right person pick up. To make matters worse, each time he tried to recall one of their numbers, he remembered less and less of it until he remembered nothing.</p><p>He fell to the floor, breath coming in rapid succession as he broke out in a cold sweat.</p><p>Why couldn’t he remember?</p><p>He had to remember.</p><p><em>Remember! </em>He grabbed his head in desperation as his eyes began to fill.</p><p>He was lost. Alone. Scared.</p><p>“Remember,” he whispered frantically to himself. “Remember, remember, remember, remember. Please.”</p><p>Then he let the tears fall.</p><p>
  <strong>_______</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>Dongmin hadn’t answered any of Bin’s texts.</p><p>Over the past couple of hours, Bin had sent Dongmin several messages during his breaks but Dongmin hadn’t replied to a single one. They were driving home now and Bin immediately tried calling him.</p><p>There was no answer.</p><p>“Have you guys heard from Dongmin?” He asked, shifting forward in his seat to lean forward between Sanha and Minhyuk in front of him.</p><p>Minhyuk shook his head as Sanha checked his phone. “I texted him earlier but he hasn’t replied.”</p><p>“He hasn’t answered us either,” Jinwoo replied for him and Myungjun.</p><p>“He’s probably asleep,” Minhyuk said calmly as if he could sense Bin’s swelling anxiety.</p><p>Bin mumbled a quiet “right” and sat back in his seat trying to reassure himself that Minhyuk was right. There was no reason to think Dongmin was in any kind of trouble. That didn’t stop his leg bouncing up and down rapidly as he gnawed on his lip nervously.</p><p>Realistically he knew he had no reason to worry, but he couldn’t help the image of Dongmin unconscious in a hospital bed, bandages and wires everywhere, from infiltrating his mind.</p><p>Bin called out for Dongmin the second they entered the dorm as he ran toward his room.</p><p>He didn’t knock, already knowing Dongmin wouldn’t be there to answer him. He threw open the door and his suspicions were confirmed.</p><p>The bed was made and Dongmin’s pyjamas sat folded neatly at the end of the bed but there was no sight of Dongmin.</p><p>“Bin?” Myungjun asked, running up behind him. “He’s not here?” His eyes went wide as he took in the empty room.</p><p>“I need to find him,” he mumbled, falling into a daze. All he could think was Dongmin lying bleeding on the floor somewhere. Bin pushed passed Myungjun, racing down the hall towards the front door, where the others were gathered frantically trying to contact Dongmin.</p><p>Jinwoo grabbed his arm before he could leave. “Hey, calm down.” He practically yelled as Bin struggled to get free of his grasp. “I know you’re worried but you can’t just go running off. We’ll find him, okay.” He grabbed Bin’s shoulder’s, forcing him to meet Jinwoo’s gaze. His eyes screamed ‘trust me’ and Bin desperately wanted to, so he forced himself to relax and took a step away from the door.</p><p>“Alright,” Jinwoo said slowly, dropping his hands, satisfied Bin wasn’t going anywhere. He turned around to the others who seemed almost frightened by the sudden turn of events. “Sanha, you stay here in case he comes back, okay?” Sanha nodded. “Keep trying to call him, and call his parents too, see if they’ve heard from him. Myungjun-hyung, Minhyuk, you two go left. Bin and I will go right, towards the main road.”</p><p>They all nodded seriously and immediately started on their missions – Sanha picked up his phone while Minhyuk and Myungjun threw on their coats and quickly exited the dorm.</p><p>Jinwoo rested a reassuring hand on Bin’s back, offering him a small smile before they followed the other two outside.</p><p>Twenty minutes later, they had circled the block three times with no sign of Dongmin. Bin crouched down, exhausted and depressed as Jinwoo spoke to Minhyuk on the phone. They hadn’t seen anything either, nor had Sanha back at home.</p><p>The bad thoughts were beginning to return and Bin was struggling to push them away. Just as he squeezed his eyes shut and his chest began to tighten, his phone vibrated in his pocket.</p><p>“Hello?” He answered, defeated.</p><p>“Bin?” A frantic voice cried down the line.</p><p>“Dongmin?” His voice cracked as he jumped up. He looked around desperately as if he expected Dongmin to be stood nearby.</p><p>“Oh thank god,” Dongmin sobbed. “Bin I-I don’t know where I am – Bin –“ He chocked off and Bin could tell he was crying which only made his heart squeeze tighter.</p><p>“Min, it’s okay, it’s okay, I’ll find you. “ He started running mindlessly – not caring when Jinwoo shouted after him – determined to find Dongmin. “Tell me what you can see.”</p><p>Dongmin described the street he was on and Bin cursed internally at himself. He and Jinwoo had passed by that street on their search but had never actually checked it. Because they hadn’t, Dongmin was now crying, alone and scared. He charged as fast as he could towards the familiar road.</p><p>“Bin, I-I-“ His voice cracked painfully. “My time’s about to run out – Bin-“</p><p>“It’s okay,” he reiterated. He was still a few minutes away, Dongmin’s time would run out long before he got there. “I’ll find you, I promise. I’m coming.”</p><p>Dongmin sobbed out a few more desperate pleas before the line cut out. Bin wanted to throw his phone across the street in frustration. He gritted his teeth and ran as fast as his legs would take him, ignoring the burning in his lungs and Jinwoo desperately chasing after him.</p><p>As he turned on to the street, he spun around, frantically searching for Dongmin. He caught sight of the phone box and took off again towards it. As he drew closer, Dongmin wasn’t anywhere to be seen. There was a full shopping bag lying on the floor of the phone box. Bin was breathless and his throat was tight, making him unable to call out for Dongmin so he continued down the road, looking down small alleys, hopefully expecting to see Dongmin on one of them waiting for him.</p><p>Then Bin saw him.</p><p>He was crouched against a building wall, legs pulled up into his chest, head tucked into his knees, as his body shook with the cold. Bin just stood, frozen, chest rising and falling rapidly as he silently thanked</p><p>“Min,” he chocked out. It was barely louder than a whisper but Dongmin heard him nonetheless, head shooting up – tears staining his cheeks – to meet Bin’s eyes. Instantly, it seemed like a weight had been taken off Dongmin’s chest. His shoulders dropped in relief as more tears began to fall. He struggled to get to his feet, legs shaking violently and Bin quickly raced to him, enveloping him in a tight embrace.</p><p>Dongmin buried his head in Bin’s shoulder, clutching at his coat and letting out a gut-wrenching cry. They fell to the floor together as Bin’s hand came up into his hair.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” Dongmin cried. “I just came out to get some food and my phone broke – I’m sorry!”</p><p>“It’s not your fault, Min,” his comfort fell on deaf ears as Dongmin continued.</p><p>“I tried to call you but I couldn’t remember your number – I couldn’t remember – I couldn’t-“</p><p>Bin held him as he cried, gently rocking back and forth as he thought about Dongmin’s words. He didn’t remember and yet he had called Bin. He remembered Bin’s number. Out of everyone, it was Bin he recalled first. He couldn’t help the swell of happiness that came along with that thought.</p><p>At that moment, Jinwoo rounded the corner, face contorted and panic-stricken. His features immediately softened, however, when he saw the two together.</p><p>Bin gave him a small nod to notify him everything was okay. His face stretched into a small, relieved smile and he stepped away, leaving the two in peace, to call the others and let them know they had found Dongmin.</p><p>Bin wasn’t sure how long he and Dongmin sat on the floor, clinging to each other. Eventually, Dongmin went limp in Bin’s arms, exhausted. Jinwoo and Bin helped him home, practically having to carry him the whole way.</p><p>The other three were waiting for them anxiously when they returned. While Jinwoo stayed with them to explain what had happened, Bin took a barely conscious Dongmin to bed.</p><p>His eyes were puffy and red and his voice was hoarse from his tears. Bin lay him down gently in his bed, pulling his shoes and socks off before tucking him in. He couldn’t help but softly caress Dongmin’s head, not wanting to leave him yet.</p><p>He took a deep, shaky breath before turning away.</p><p>However, before he could leave, a hand grabbed his wrist. He spun around, shocked at the contact. Dongmin still had his eyes closed, his movements seeming like a reflex.</p><p>“Stay,” he whispered, grasp tightening.</p><p>And so Bin stayed.</p><p>He took a seat on the bed next to Dongmin, wrapping an arm around his shoulders when the older man nestled into Bin’s side.</p><p>In the weeks since Dongmin had woken up, Bin hadn’t let himself hope for a second that things could ever go back to how they were before the accident. However, as he held Dongmin - knowing in some sense he had remembered Bin - he allowed himself a brief moment of hope: maybe everything would be okay.</p><p>
  <strong>_______</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>When Dongmin woke up the next morning (afternoon), he was alone. Dongmin could hardly remember the events of the night before after Bin and Jinwoo had brought him home, but he vaguely recalled holding someone as he drifted off to sleep. <em>Wishful thinking</em>, he assumed, dismissing the idea.</p><p>He trudged out of his room, still half asleep and yawning loudly. As he rounded the corner, heading towards the bathroom, he ran into someone.</p><p>“Sorry, he mumbled to Bin, face involuntarily turning pink. His mind flashed to how Bin had held him in the cold alley the night before and suddenly he couldn’t meet the other man's eyes. By the looks of it, however, Moon Bin felt the same as he looked away, scratching his neck awkwardly.</p><p>The two shuffled nervously on their feet as they exchanged quiet pleasantries.</p><p>As Dongmin began to sense Bin’s increasing desire to escape, he took the opportunity to say what he should have said the night before.</p><p>“Thank you for coming to find me.”</p><p>Bin’s eyes widened as his head tilted up slightly. “How could I not?” he mumbled.</p><p>“What?” Dongmin questioned, not having heard his reply.</p><p>“I mean,” he looked up and smiled brightly at Dongmin. <em>It’s not real,</em> he thought, noting how his eyes didn’t crinkle at the edges like they usually did. “I mean of course we came to find you,” he added the ‘we’ purposely this time. He chuckled softly, “you scared the crap out of us when you weren’t here.”</p><p>“I’m sorry.”</p><p>“It’s not your fault,” he shrugged dismissively. “It’s those stupid kids who broke your phone."</p><p>“Oh my god, my phone!” He cried in realisation, eyes widening and mouth dropping open. The members had all chipped in to get it for him and he had wrecked it in less than two weeks.</p><p>His guilt was quickly diminished when Bin laughed loudly at his expression, clutching his stomach. Then, before they knew it, the conversation drifted and morphed from Dongmin’s broken phone to what they’d have for breakfast to that day’s schedule to frogs (for some reason) until neither knew how they had gotten on to the subject they were amicably discussing.</p><p>They laughed and chatted in the hall like old friends with years to catch up on. Dongmin basked in Bin’s company, silently begging it would never end.</p><p>However, all good things…</p><p>“Are you done flirting?” Both men jumped in surprise, turning to see a semi-conscious Minhyuk in his pyjamas grumpily slouching behind them.</p><p>“You’re blocking the bathroom door,” he gestured to the door they are stood beside. The two quickly jumped away allowing the sullen young man to pass into the bathroom, shutting the door loudly behind him.</p><p>“He’s not usually like that,” Bin immediately reassured. “He’s just tired, he’ll be better once he has a shower, don’t take it personally.”</p><p>Dongmin nodded but couldn’t help take it personally. After all, Minhyuk was only tired because he spent the night out searching for him.</p><p>“I should go,” Bin said, breaking Dongmin out of his thoughts. “I need to get dressed.” It’s only then that Dongmin realised the other man and been stood talking to him the entire time in his loose pyjamas and slippers.</p><p>“Oh, of course, I’m sorry!” he fussed, lowing his head in embarrassment.</p><p>“Bye,” Bin whispered, slowly turning away.</p><p>For some reason, Dongmin couldn’t stand to watch him walk away and quickly turned on his heels to make his way down the hall. However, before he could, Bin called out to him.</p><p>“Wait!”</p><p>Dongmin spun back in time to see Bin jogging up to him. “Can I ask you something?” He started cautiously.</p><p>Dongmin nodded. “Yesterday when you called me, you said you couldn’t remember any of or numbers…”</p><p>“Oh right,” he rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m not sure what happened. I thought I had memorised all of your numbers but when I got to the phone booth, I panicked and suddenly I couldn’t remember anything.”</p><p>Bin noted how Dongmin began to shake and reached out a comforting hand to rub up and down his arm. “I’m sorry, that must have been really scary… but that’s not my question.” Dongmin tilted his head curiously. “You say you didn’t remember anything but you called me. How?”</p><p>Dongmin is silent for a few moments, not quite knowing the answer himself.</p><p>“I’m not sure. I just – I was sat on the floor trying to remember any of your phone numbers but it was like the more I tried to remember, the more I forgot…” He took a shaky breath in, head lowering. “Then, all of a sudden I just… knew.”</p><p>Dongmin lifted his head and their eyes met, Bin’s lips falling open slightly in surprise at his response. Dongmin knows this is weird. The look they shared is one far too intimate for ‘close friends’ and yet the meaning behind it remains a mystery; like a book Dongmin is unable to read.</p><p>And still, he couldn’t look away.</p><p>Then he repeated, voice unwavering and gaze lingering on Bin. “I just knew.”</p><p>This time it’s not in reference to a phone number but instead to feelings that refuse to stay hidden any longer.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Short chapter but I hope you liked it. I'll try and make future chapters longer. Thank you for reading.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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